Life
“Are you afraid of Death Woman?” His question was unexpected.
“No”, she trembled a little.
“Don´t lie to yourself”.
“I´m not, I´m not afraid of death” she said securely.
“You should be”, he stated as he walked closer to her “… because you are still alive”.
"Were you afraid when you died Ulquiorra?" her question took him by surprise.
"I…I don´t remember Woman", Ulquiorra replied softly as if he remembered something that he surely didn’t want to.
"And you are afraid of death now?" this time she was playing a game.
"I´m already dead" He was angry now. He could feel it.
"No, you are not…not exactly." Orihime whisperer softly but she knew he could hear her. She took a step closer to him.
Orihime extended a hand to him. Ulquiorra was shocked at her sudden action and then he felt her soft hand upon his cheek.
"Your eyes...there is something in them that tell me...that you are... kind of alive", She giggled a little as she continued, "Or at least you want to be".
Ulquiorra frowned, took the wrist of the hand upon his cheek and removed it, "Why would I want to be human trash?"
"I didn’t say human, I said alive", she calmly pointed out as she stared into the depth of his emotionless eyes.
"You are selfish", he said staring back with equal intensity.
"Maybe", she admitted.
"Why do you want me to live?" he asked in a tone that Orihime never heard from him before, but behind his words were something more…something that Orihime herself could understand so easily. “It is impossible”.
“Then I want to be dead”, she said as she lowered her eyes to the floor.
"You are life itself woman and I am death, you need to understand that”, Ulquiorra explained, thinking merely about their abilities and powers, nothing more…or at least that was what he told to himself.
Orihime stared at him again for a moment and later placed her head against his chest.
Ulquiorra´s eyes widened, he was frozen for a moment. He didn’t approve of her sudden action but he made no attempt to remove her head from where it rested, nor did he make an attempt to step back.
“Show me what is death and I will show you what is life”, she said with a desperate desire for them to understand each other, her warm breath against his chest.
Ulquiorra wrapped an arm around her.
"You would not like it”
And he was right.
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Orihime had a river of mixed feelings in their final moments.
Anger, sadness, despair, regret, impotence and even happiness.
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What is a heart?
A Heart is life.
Then I am dead.
What is despair?
It is what you feel when you are dead.
Then…I am alive.
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She wants to be dead. He wants to be alive.
If that meant they could be together.
Orihime realized that she was immersed in a world that lacked honesty. She hid her true feelings many times before, uttering lifeless words. Only when she met Ulquiorra did she finally express her real feelings openly. You cannot truly live life without expressing what you really feel in your heart. She watched as he turned to ash. The revelation of her discovery through the time they spent together now sinking deeper and deeper into her soul. This overcame all of her mixed emotions and resulted in her desperate attempt to take his extended hand.
How ironic that a hollow, a heartless being lacking in a purpose to live, taught her the real meaning of life and the connection it held with the heart.
